Nevermore: Friends Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing, How to Kill Your Family, Wesley the Owl

 

Reported by Garry

 

Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir by Matthew Perry is a frank, darkly hilarious look at life by one of the stars of the most watched television series of the past 30 years. Born in Massachusetts and raised in Canada and Los Angeles, Matthew Perry was a nationally ranked teenaged tennis star before getting bit by the acting bug, and eventually found himself on the set of Friends – the blockbuster show that would define his acting career. Along the way, Perry became addicted to drugs – an addiction that he speaks about with candor in this memoir. Our reader said that Perry’s book was a real eye-opener, and that she now knows much more about the addiction process than she ever had previously.

 

How to Kill Your Family by Bella Mackie. Grace is in jail for murder, and she has murdered people, just not the one of which she is accused. Grace discovered that her previously unknown millionaire father rejected her dying mother’s pleas for help, and vowed revenge against not only him, but every other member of his family, one by one – which she does. Gleefully. Our reader says that this book is both dark and very funny, and recommends it to anyone who has a dark sense of humor and likes books along the lines of Villanelle (the basis for the Killing Eve TV series) and My Sister, the Serial Killer.

 

Wesley The Owl: The Remarkable Love Story of an Owl and His Girl by Stacey O’Brien is the heart-touching true story of Wesley, a barn owl and the human that raised him. Wesley was born with nerve damage to his wing and would never be able to survive in the wild. He was “adopted” by O’Brien, a trained biologist. The two spent an astonishing 19 years together, time which was documented by O’Brien with copious notes and photographs. Over the years, O’Brien got to know Wesley’s personality (he wouldn’t tolerate lies), his quirks (he also wouldn’t tolerate any of O’Brien’s would-be suitors), and how deeply intelligent and sensitive this bird of prey is.

 

Also mentioned:

 

Murder She Wrote series by Jessica Fletcher (and various authors)

The Good Sister by Gillian McAllister

Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver

Life Travel and the People in Between by Mike Nixon

John Vance Journal

Whale Day: And Other Poems by Billy Collins

The Paris Seamstress by Natasha Lester

Master Slave Husband Wife: An Epic Journey from Slavery to Freedom by Ilyon Woo

Just As I Am: A Memoir by Cicely Tyson

Lessons in Chemistry By Bonnie Garmus

My Dream of You by Nuala O’Faolain

Southernmost by Silas House

Tales from the Café: Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

The Lady Sherlock series by Sherry Thomas

Hell Bent by Leigh Bardugo

Eat and Flourish: How Food Supports Emotional Well-Being by Mary Beth Albright

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing by Matthew Perry

Reviewed by Kristin

In this new memoir, Matthew Perry does not hold back. He talks openly about his family, friends, and lovers. He also talks a lot about his love of a good view and the millions of dollars he has spent fighting his addictions. His honesty comes through as he talks about a whole lot of bad choices, and a few good ones, that he has made.

While being shuttled back and forth between his divorced parents, young Matthew was often sent on an airplane bearing a sign “Unaccompanied Minor”. The theme runs through the book, a kid’s loneliness and uncertainty at being put into the care of flight attendants and airport personnel at a young age. Matthew grew up, but the feeling of being unaccompanied continued. The feeling of not being good enough followed him through every relationship. Near the end he does throw out a comment like “Hey, I’m not going to do that in my next relationship, and by the way ladies, I’m still single!”

A major health problem—or you might say a disaster—helped Matthew to the realization that he had to quit smoking, drinking, and taking drugs. No spoilers here: in the very beginning he talks about his colon exploding as a result of opioid use, and the indignity of living with a colostomy bag for a year. Many surgeries later, he is still hoping that everything holds together and he won’t end up with his bodily waste collected outside of his body once again.

The book is certainly a tell-all, mostly about himself but also about those around him. While a few friends and family are always held up as blameless and supportive, Matthew also writes about those relationships that he wishes had gone another way. He’s not above name dropping either, both for celebrity exposure or for shock value. Reviews have lambasted him for mourning the death of River Phoenix and immediately lamenting that yet “Keanu Reeves still walks among us.” Matthew also repeats the line later upon hearing of Chris Farley’s death. He claims to have just picked a name out of the air, but two mentions of Keanu Reeves seems a little harsh.

For those reading just to hear about the ten-year run of the television show Friends, Matthew drops many little details about his time on the set. Mostly, he talks about how he somehow managed to work while his addictions clawed at him, and how his co-actors and producers worked with him through various stints in rehab centers. The cast truly became an ensemble as they supported each other through many highs and lows. (Cue the theme song: “I’ll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. I’ll be there for you, like I’ve been there before. I’ll be there for you, ‘cause you’re there for me too…”

Yes, I watched Friends like many others around the world. I started rooting for Monica and Chandler to get together way before it actually happened. The show was a comfort watch in the days when you had to turn on the TV at the right time to catch your favorite characters lounging on a big orange couch in Central Perk. This memoir took me back to the places where I was in life while watching the show. It is an unflinching look at the struggles of one man, and I appreciate that Matthew is sharing this with us.

After all his health issues and rehab stays, Matthew says there is just one thing he knows he can do—he can help others trying to get clean and sober. He says that he has worked with hundreds of people in various groups. I hope that someone with their own struggles can also read this and find a bit of hope.